Prince of ParkourPersia.

So, there's these three brothers. Jeff out of Coupling, The Geezer Out of
Rocknrolla and Donny Darko. Their dad is Ronald Pickup, and their uncle is Ben
Kingsley. And they're the Persian royal family. Isn't genetics interesting?

Anyway, the lads are out on the razz, conquering and suchlike, when they come
upon an ancient holy city, which they have been told by their dad not to, on
any account, under any circumstances, lay siege to and conquer. They have a
brief conference with their uncle, and conclude that it would be best to lay
siege to it and conquer it. Which they do, which appears to involve Donnie
running up walls a whole lot.

The king arrives, and is a tiny displeased afterward, but really not that
much. He's basically no more displeased than your dad would be if you bought
him a really expensive birthday present and he was "oh, no you shouldn't have,
this is too much."

Anyway, as this is Ancient Persia, there is a sudden but inevitable betrayal of
someone by his brother. But since everyone in the film with a name is someone
else's brother at this point, it's not clear who. But we can probably rule out
Ronald and Donnie, since Donnie gets the blame, and has to run for his life,
and Ronald's dead.

So, Donnie goes on the lam with a magical dagger he picked up while looting the
place, followed by Princess Gemma "sulky mouth" Arterton who is sworn to
protect it. And since the Naughty Brother actually has designs on using the
dagger to Do Bad Things, much chasey chasey ensues. We pick up Alfred Molina as
Dodgy Geezer With Heart Of Gold on the way, and the whole matter turns into a
big convoluted thing where we have to put everything to rights and foil the
plans of the evildoer.

It's all quite fun really. There's nothing wrong with any of it, it's all quite
good. My chief reservation is that it's all a bit artificial. It's an adventure
story in the mould of classics like Raiders of the Lost Ark, but that vital
spark is somehow missing. You really don't get the feeling that it was ever the
burning desire of anyone involved in this film to tell this story. It's
perfectly competently constructed, there's not really a bad performance in it,
the effects are good, the story is frankly ludicrous, but not in a bad way, and
it all looks very impressive. I just don't feel like it was made with love, or
any kind of passion, and so it failed to inspire. I wouldn't say it's a bad
film, in fact, I'd say it was quite good. But it's nothing exciting, in a genre
where being exciting is the whole point.